Surprising Loveliness

Yesterday the most beautiful thing happened.  I was walking into World Gym to teach my class when a student comes up to me and hands me a beautiful gift bag.  "This is for you," she says.  I was stunned.  I didn't know her name, she's been coming to my class for awhile but she's been sort of a loner, doesn't smile or make eye contact much.  In fact, I've often thought maybe she doesn't like the class all that much since she doesn't really give any indication of how she feels.  Her energy is.... well, let's just say it's not easily readable. 

I bring my hand over my heart, look her in the eye and exclaim, "why, thank you!  how sweet!" and move to hug her.  She hugs me back and begins to cry.  I hold her and hug her back, not really knowing what to say but knowing whatever was going on with her was profound and I just needed to hold the space (and her!) for it.

She looks at me once last time and then turns to walk out the door.  At first, I'm alarmed... oh no, was I supposed to open it there? Is this her last class?  Maybe she's moving... or worse...  But she comes back, lays her mat down and prepares for class.  Puzzled, I try to catch her eyes, wanting to make sure she's okay but she's back in yoga mode.  I decide to teach... knowing that the yoga itself will help and teach a heart opening class complete with lotus meditation.  After class, again I try to catch her eye and just as she turns to leave, she looks my way.  Again, I put my hand over my heart... Thank you.  Sincerely. She smiles.

The class is very chatty, everyone wanting to bond... typical (and wonderful) after a heart opening class but I was wishing I could hurry out and meet her in the parking lot and find out what was up.  However, I know sometimes space is needed... so I let her be.  I pick up the gift bag and bring it home with me... so curious.

In the bag are beautiful note pads, stationary covered with roses, how lovely.  I search for a card, hoping for an explanation.  No card.  But the little tag on the bag says:

"Thank you so much.  Your class, your personality...are very healing for me."

And she signed it with her name.  I am touched.  And excited to know her name. And feeling very blessed to be a teacher. It's tough to teach in a gym... the classes are large, you are always running late because the class before you goes long and afterwards people are pushing you out for their workout, the space is tricky to maintain a peaceful atmosphere in and you don't really have time to get to know your students individually unless they choose to let you.  Sometimes, it's anonymity they are looking for, a place to go where no one knows them or wants anything from them.  I love to get to know them slowly... body first, words later.  It makes for an interesting perspective.

Funny how the Universe works.  I've been feeling kinda down lately... my classes at CCPC are flucuating again so I get to relearn the lesson that sometimes the world doesn't revolve around me, sometimes it has to do with other's priorities... but it's hard for me to NOT take it personally when folks stop coming to yoga.  Or Reiki.  But just when I decide that I should just get a day job and let go of my dream, the Universe places a reminder of what I truly am here for.... not gift bags,  but to help people heal. 

Thank you, blessed yoga student, you made my day :)

Patterning of Consciousness

I've been on a kick lately to help my yoga students really make a commitment to yoga and to understand why they should.  There is so much more to yoga than I teach. Most teachers do not really delve into the sacred texts, the Sanskrit writings, the "meat and bones" of what yoga is and why it works.... they don't want to scare or confuse their students.  And believe me, yoga can be very confusing unless you study and practice for a long time!  That's why a commitment is so important.

As I was preparing for my Restorative Yoga Day this weekend, I pulled out my 2 favorite Yoga "Bibles"...Patan'jali's Yoga Sutras and Stephen Mitchell's adaptation of The Bhagavad Gita,  all highlighted and post-noted beyond original recognition. Reading through these books is like coming home for me, I just get lost in remembering the truth, the wisdom that led me to yoga and kept me there in the first place.  I'm skimming through, looking for just the right quote or passage to start our day with and it dawns on me that I haven't ever really shared this with my students! Shame on me!  How can I call myself a Yoga Teacher and never share the Yoga Bibles?

So I begin with the first Sutra:

1. Now, the teachings of yoga.

2. Yoga is to still the patterning of consciousness. 

3. Then pure awareness can abide in its very nature. 

4. Otherwise awareness takes itself to be the patterns of consciousness.

Oh so true... so true!!  Perfect, I think to myself... It states exactly WHY we are doing yoga.  I turn to my husband, the winner of the top ten yogis award this year.... "See, honey!  Listen to this, this is why we do yoga!"

His response:  HUH??!  What the heck is patterning of consciousness?

Me:  Oh... yeah... that's why I don't teach this.  Not that I think my husband or my students wouldn't get it, but I know it's something you have to kinda read over and over... and let it simmer on your brain til it boils. 

I turn to my old friend, Bhagavad Gita-- much easier to understand.  THE BLESSED LORD SAID... Oh dear, this could be a minefield also.  I make it a practice to not "go there" religious-wise.  I don't want to offend the Christians by suggesting that Krishna is Lord or offend the Jews by suggesting that Christ is the Lord... ugh, people get so easily offended by labels and then they miss the message...just the word Lord upsets some people, I don't want the beauty of the Gita being bogged down by dissecting each word. 

What to do?  I DON'T want to sell yoga short.  I DO want people to understand why they are doing yoga, what it's really all about. How to share this in a non threatening way???  And then I realize...who the heck am I to decide that my students won't get it or that they may be offended in some way?  What gives me the right to withhold information from them for fear of losing them?  How ridiculous am I?  These are grown ups here.

So, I plunge in, reading from the Yoga Sutra to them bright and early Saturday morning.  Their response?

HUH?!!

LOL.  But then we had one of the most lively, enlightening discussions I had in a long time.  We took it line by line, understanding the patterns of consciousness and relating them to our lives.  I read to them during relaxation pose from The Bhagavad Gita, I actually saw one of my "Christian" friends wiping tears from her eyes at the beautiful text.  Quite a few of them had deep breakthrough experiences of enlightenment, one was even inspired to write her own poem, right on the spot, about the trees that we looked up to during our first yoga session outdoors.

And once again, I learned to untie my own pattern of consciousness by realizing I don't control the world.  Again. :)

The Warrior of the Light knows that no one is stupid and that life teaches everyone-however long that may take

He always does his best and expects the best of others.  Through his generosity, he tries to show each person how much they are capable of achieving.

Some of his companions say:  "Some people are so ungrateful."

The Warrior is not discouraged by this.  And he continues to encourage others because this is also a way of encouraging himself.

Warrior of the Light by Paulo Coelho... my other "Bible".

Namaste'

 

 

Quiet

I find myself in that time and space where quiet is resonating deep within. It's a little window before the noise. It's like a physical presence enveloping me, almost like angel wings around my shoulders. My ears are almost ringing with the loudness of the quiet. It is only broken by the tapping of my fingers on the keys and today, even that is sporadic.

Last night at yoga it occurred to me that this is the time of year when the only quiet some people have is at yoga. It may be the only part of their life, besides sleep, where there are no cell phones ringing, no tv, no computer, shopping, children, parents, cars, nothing to disturb the sound of their own breath and heart beating. For some, it is hard to go from the hustle and bustle into that quiet. It can be deafening. And it's not just the quiet. It's the constant go go go. To actually take the time to settle deep into a pose and just stay there long enough to find that tiny adjustment that opens the window to a new revelation is really hard. But very worthwhile.

Relax.....Breathe.....Feel......Watch.....Allow.....

My yoga last night felt like a prayer, a trance, a meditation. I had to keep lifting my consciousness enough to remember I was teaching. Sometimes the mind, body and spirit connect so seamlessly that it becomes difficult to know where one begins and one lets off... or if they even do. I hope my students felt it too. It felt like that was what was needed. Quiet. Deep going within.

For some, who haven't practiced for long or been able to keep up their practice, I could see it was difficult at first. That monkey mind takes time to settle down. But by the end it seemed as if all were breathing a bit slower, their movements were more fluid, there was a sureness about them that they didn't walk in with.

Until relaxation. I got the bright idea to do relaxation in silence, which is usually really powerful. Unless the Chorale is practicing in the next room. Very, very loudly. But oh well, practice means finding the quiet within ... no matter how high the sopranos go.

Namaste'

Yoga in Small Places

Lately we've been doing yoga at my house to save energy at the church. I really hate turning on their a/c/heat to try and fill that humongous Sanctuary for an hour. Especially when the classes are small. It's interesting at CCPC how class sizes vary but I'm tired of thinking/worrying about that so let's go in another direction.

Since I've moved the classes they have been filled. Really filled. Course the room is much smaller. And easier to fill. But it has been so much fun with the full classes in the filled room. Twists are especially fun "now, everyone in unison turn to the RIGHT" Seems as if there's always someone who turns left and much giggling ensues. Of course, as everyone knows; twists are GREAT toxin relievers... Now, toxin release is a major source of anxiety/humor in most yoga classes. Yoga is designed specifically for releasing toxins, problem is most people are uncomfortable with releasing those toxins in public. I have seen many a yogi in dire distress when I say, "OK, Let's roll". (Rolling is when you hold on to your feet and roll back to your shoulders and then back up without touching said feet to the ground. Takes core strength and a push....last thing you want to do when you are trying to hold onto your toxins)

I've seen grown men crying while rolling. Crying with laughter that is. But it's one thing to have your body loudly announce that you have toxins in a large room. The sound is very muffled for one thing. And the people on your left and right are really the only ones who know it was you. It's easier for the yoga teacher to just move on like nothing happened. (and really, it's not that big a deal AWWW GROW UP PEOPLE!!!) I do have to admit to sometimes having to control my own giggling too though LOL! Let's face it: Farts are funny. However, in a smaller room.... there's no hiding. And the sound amplifies. And invariably someone starts giggling and it sets off the whole room. Try maintaining a peaceful atmosphere after that.

So, there are some drawbacks to a smaller room. But seeing all the joy when the yogis can reach out and hold up each other's legs in Half Moon pose... and the amount of people holding hands during relaxation... and having all my stuff right there; my eye pillows and cushions and music and crystals and essential oils... ahhhh. It's been really nice. The room is filled with Reiki energy and it shows. When we cleanse and fill our souls at the end you can almost see the energy in your hands. On Friday, we did our Sun Salutations outside on my deck and when I lifted my hands for the final blessing, a butterfly flew between them! It was sooo cool! Transformation...

I'm going to keep the classes the way they are. And I'm adding my Tuesday class back since so many have asked. And my husband came up with a great idea: since the room really only holds 8 comfortably (we've been having 9 or 10) and we worry/hope that more will show up and then it will be disruptive having to move the whole class to the church... I put a form on my website www.yolinna.com/yoga.html where all people have to do is check a box to tell me what classes they are coming to. When the total gets over 8, I email them that we're moving to the church--and will post it on the page. They just have to check before they leave and go to the right place. Seems easy enough huh? (fingers crossed)

When I grow up, I want to have a large studio to teach yoga in. By the beach. With an exhaust fan just in case.....

The Witness

*

" The Witness"

Out beyond all ideas of right doing

and wrong doing,

there is a field.

I'll meet you there. ~ Rumi

*

I updated my Witness card. I find the idea of the Witness to be extremely intriguing. In my yoga classes I introduce this concept quite frequently. It's a tough concept to grasp because of course, the moment you grasp it, it's gone. It's one of those things that makes others think you're nuts when you start talking about it. "Witness, what the heck? I am Me, there's no witness!"

*

"Then who's the One watching the breath?"

*

When we use the Witness in SoulCollage it's very powerful. At the facilitator's training we each got a chance to be the four corners of facilitating; Witness, Reader, Facilitator, Scribe. While each part was fascinating, I found Witness to be the most powerful. Watching the process without forming opinions, judgements or feeling any need to interact or "perform" was amazing. When the reading was over, the insights the Witness had were so telling that sometimes just a single word from them put the whole reading in perspective.

*

There is comfort to be found in witnessing and in being witnessed. Sort of like the ancestor's memories, keeping watch, being able to pass on. Words like unbiased, accepting, not trying to change anything, experiencing, come to mind. How many times do you experience something without trying to change it? Or label it? Have you ever looked at a tree without categorizing or naming it? What about an animal? Or a person?

*

This is a powerful meditation. Try it. Allow yourself to witness a tree without naming it. Staying with it and watching without trying to change that moment by going to the past or future. What is the tree in this moment? What are you in this moment? Silently witnessing. The breath comes in. The breath comes out. No need to analyze. It will do it of it's own accord. Most things will if we just allow it.

*

Relax. Breathe. Feel. Allow. Watch (Witness).

*

from Stephen Cope's Wisdom of Yoga

and Yolinna's Yoga Wall

AHA Moments

One of the things that is really cool about SoulCollage are those AHA moments. At the facilitator training someone actually went around with a name tag that said "looking for AHA moments". I've had many, many, long before Oprah decided to coin the phrase. Yoga is really good at giving you that sudden breakthrough, you do the same pose a hundred times and then suddenly, one tiny muscle lets go and you see the Universe and all It's possibilities and all It's glory.

Course you have to really stick with yoga to get that and you have to understand it isn't all about the physical poses. I feel really sad for people who think you can dabble in things and get those AHA moments, they rarely come without some consistency and hard work. And unfortunately, when things get busy, often the first thing to go is the tools that help you to be productive, calm and happy and that give you those AHA moments. The next thing you know you're sitting on a couch deciding that a glass of wine and tv is your path to enlightenment. And it gets harder and harder to get off that couch. So sad.

Although having said that, let me tell you this: I don't know if it's because of all the soul work I've already done with yoga and all my various studies BUT I have had more AHA moments with SoulCollage in a relatively short time than I have with anything else. Now, it could be I'm just open to it. I have a student/friend/coach that is experiencing the same phenomenon. She's a Gestalt psychotherapist so she may have a leg up too but she's very blown away at the possibilities and the rapidness of the AHA's too. The onion is peeling rapidly....

I've made enough cards now that I could cover the backs and actually separate them into the 4 suits; Committee, Community, Companion & Council. They are beautiful. I like to just look at them. I did a reading the other day with the suits for the first time. Wow. I had one card that I made that I just really had no idea what it was about. Of course it was the first card to come up. When you do a reading the first thing you do is ask a question. My question was concerning my son. The card to come up was the one where the boy is catching the ball while the older one is watching with glee, hands covering her mouth.

AHA!

It is very cool when you just allow the process to go through you without asking why. Sometimes images come together and it makes no immediate sense. And then down the road the card pops into a reading or even just into your head....and it's just like with all insights...you knew it all along. Like the Buddha says, "ten thousand doors open and you can see in all directions and you realize you always could, it is older than you." Enlightenment. If only for a moment. That "knowing" is a powerful soul-finder. And an even more powerful God finder. And it really helps when you are making decisions if you can come from that "knowing" God point inside of you and not some exhausted crisis mode outside of you.

Takes some practice though. And consistency. And being comfortable with "knowing". And honoring what your real path and journey through life is.....and most of all, quietness. Mindfullness instead of Mindlessness....

Peace be with you. Really with you.

Bats

Oh dear.

The bats are back in the belfry.

When it was there regularly, I overcame my terror and just ignored it. With one eye staying on it of course. But it was only an "it" then. Now it's a "them". After my class last night when we were gathering and basking in the ambiance, it started. A HUMONGOUS black thing flying over our heads. And then another. I ducked for cover. I put a bolster over my head for protection. Waiting for the men folk to DO SOMETHING!!! And they were just admiring it/them. Wandering around, wondering where they came in and where they roost and what the air velocity was and whether the nor'easter had brung them and all that usual men stuff.

Finally, being the sane person in the room, I crawled on my hands & knees to the light switch and quickly turned them on! Helllloooo!!!! No more bats!!! Now why didn't they think of that? Silly men folk.

Man. I hate it when the bats start flying around and I have to try and keep my voice from squealing and try to overcome the impulse to run screaming out of the room while my poor students are perpetually in relaxation pose....Course if I'm screaming, they ain't gonna be relaxing. You see why there's a problem. Why do the bats circle so low? I KNOW they are after my hair....my brothers and cousins convinced me that I have just the perfect hair for bats nests....the right color and consistency....shudder....

I guess I'll be back to teaching from under the communion table. Maybe I should wear a scarf....

The Fool

Yep. Fool. That's me. AKA Gooney Goo goo......

Mmmmm. Yoga. Should this be community or committee?

Just thinking out loud......unless of course you wanna tell me.....

Hope you all are having the most marvelous day....I've kinda got lots of stuff I'm supposed to be doing so I really need to get off of here :) TTYL!

Master Jeff

Last night a woman who I admire very much came to my yoga class. I have done Reiki on her with Jan and she is just one of the most amazing people you would ever meet. I have been intrigued by her for a while, she just has such light about her. So needless to say, when she walked in the door I was pretty excited and grateful for the opportunity to get to know her a little better. After the class, we were chatting and the subject of Tai Chi came up. Turns out that she took Tai Chi from my master Jeff! She knew him quite well, we must have passed each other many times since it was around the same time. Of course, she is so sweet, when I said, "Maybe we were in the same class!" She said with a very sweet smile, "oh no Linda, I would have remembered you." I love this lady.

In reminiscing about the class, I got to thinking what an impact Master Jeff has had on my life. He was the very first truly spiritual man I had ever met. I had never heard of the Tao or knew anything about Buddhism or any eastern philosophy before I met him. He studied in Taiwan under a great Master. He knew so much. He was a great teacher, just the right amount of detachment and attachment. He knew when to be firm and when to back off. He introduced a whole new world to me. He would wink at me and say, "I'm going to teach you the physical but I know some of you would like the magical mystery tour so I'll teach you that too." I loved him, absolutely worshipped the ground he walked on. His voice rings in my head to this day, his touch, his gentle wisdom. He was that once in a lifetime teacher that some of us are lucky enough to stumble across that you realize is one of the main reasons you are who you are today.

Tai Chi is very beautiful and very frustrating. Especially if you are as type A as I was when I found him. Believe it or not, I used to work about 70 hours a week as a Operations Manager for a Mortgage Broker. High stress, fast paced, hit the ground running butt kisser. I worked on the high end builder accounts, had about 30 employees to oversee and train and set up new offices, computers, million dollar deals and schmoozed with the big boys on a regular basis. I was 27 years old, diagnosed with a bleeding ulcer, and had doctors prescribe tranquilizers and codeine for the migraines. I was the youngest officer the company had ever had. I made a ton of money. I was also on the verge of a divorce and a nervous breakdown. Crazy.

The very first class I ever went to, I asked some inane question and Jeff said, "so, can you talk with your shoulders away from your ears or is that brick a permanent fixture?" I had no clue what he was talking about. He came over and smoothed my shoulders down and it actually HURT to relax. I spent many, many months just trying to get the shoulders down, the more I "tried" the worse it got. Month after month I get one area to finally smooth, only for him to identify another. It was maddening. And it saved my life. I would confront him, "maybe some people just aren't meant to do Tai Chi, maybe it's just for old people, maybe the world needs tense people, and so on". He would smile. And he would start doing the postures. And he would say, "well, then why are you here?" Why indeed.....

I stayed with him for 3 years. Twice a week, every week. Quit my job, rearranged my world, owned my life. Studied, studied, studied, read everything I could get my hands on, became a Taoist, learned to breathe and relax. Towards the end of my classes, Jeff was having a really hard time with the "Y", he would come in so frustrated and so sad, I just couldn't take it. I didn't know that I was an empath then, I only knew that I would come out of his classes angry and upset, not knowing that it was his frustration I was picking up on and not knowing how to clear it. Mary told me that he finally gave up about a year after I left. I tried to find another teacher, and years later, tried to find him again to no avail. Went on to yoga and was blessed with another mentor but I have always thought of him in everything I do. I could not teach yoga if I hadn't learned Tai Chi.

I am so grateful for Jeff's presence in my life. Have you ever had a teacher like that? One that just quietly changed everything you ever knew to be true and helped you find the answers that were best for you? What a great spirit he has. I wish him the best that this world has to offer, he brought so much to all he did. Namaste' Master Jeff and Thank You!

Ups and Downs

The hardest part of having your own business is all the ups and downs. And learning not to take it personally. When I first started teaching yoga, if someone came to my class and didn't come back I took it hard, feeling as if they didn't like ME. It took me a while to figure out that it could have been that they didn't like YOGA. Not everyone does. It took me an even longer while to figure out that it may be my STYLE of yoga they didn't like or that I just wasn't the right teacher for them. Some days I am even able to accept that they just didn't like me and that is okay too. Other days.....

Same as with my regulars. I have an extremely loyal group of students spread over different venues. Most days my classes are huge, especially at the gym. Occasionally my classes are light, especially at the church. Again, learning to not take it personally has been a worthwhile life lesson. I had to figure out that sometimes people have other things to do or they just don't want to leave their houses, especially at night. It took me awhile to figure out that maybe it has more to do with THEM then me. Triggers that whole world spinning around yourself gene.
Branching out and offering new classes and new times in new places is terrifying. There's always that teenage girl "what if I threw a party and no one came" issue. I hate that one. One minute it's all excitement and the next the roller coaster begins it's rapid descent. Like Jeff Goldblum in Jurassic Park, "oh yeah, first it's all oooos and ahhhhs, and then there's running and screaming...".

The cool thing is that yoga really helps with those ups and downs. In yoga and meditation, you learned to not attach to results. Rule number one. So the pose is uncomfortable, just breathe.....so you balance for the first time, just breathe.....so you have monkey mind, just breathe.....so you don't, just breathe.... In other words, the outcome is never the important part. The breath, the moment, that's what is important. Past, future, they come, they go. The breath is NOW, the breath is the only constant. So, I have a big class....just let it flow. So, no one shows up for my event....just let it flow.

Trust in the breath. And the Universe to support you. Thats the Up. And the Down.

Yoga

Just got back from teaching my night class--taught this morning for the first time at 5678 too. Can I just say that I am so happy my back is back? It's really cool what yoga can do. When I was younger, I hurt my back falling down on the bowling lanes....don't ask. Barry and I had the weird distinction of having the Ziggy clause put into our car insurance. We had a stretch of time early in our relationship where people kept trying to kill us with their automobiles. We'd be driving along, minding our own business and boom! Someone would crash into us. The insurance company said the Ziggy clause meant that if there was an accident in a 50 mile radius of where we were, we would be involved in it. Which was really not all that funny when you think about it....We were never charged, it was never our fault, we were just snake bit. Something like 10 in a year--for real.

Anyway, between the accidents and the bowling incident (seriously, don't ask) my back took a beating. Went to doctors who kept giving me pain killers and cortisone shots (seriously again, who gives a 20 year old codeine and percocet???) Had Xrays, they said I fractured a vertebrae, blady, blady.....took months to heal and I was young.

Randomly over the years it has flared up. Again, months. However, in the last 10 years since I've been doing yoga--only 2 flare ups. And each one over in a matter of days, less than 2 weeks. And with the exception of one day, I was never flat out....could still function. Pretty amazing.

If you took my classes this week, you could see--other than a bit less flexibility due to honoring--my back is great.

Thank God. And Yoga. And well, okay, the wretched back cracker.....

Good night. Sleep tight. And as far as those bed bugs.....ummmm....what is that about?

Peaceful

For those of you that saw my last "emo" post that I deleted, rest assured, I am fine. I needed to work through some things and I am blessed with the clarity and insights that come from pain and disillusionment. So, it's all good. I'm sorry if I worried anyone.

In fact, it's better than good. Funny how when things seem at their lowest, if you really allow yourself to feel them without judging and denying or justifying, you can really begin to find out how you really feel about things.

This is what I try and teach at yoga. When a pose begins to get challenging, that is when the real work begins. How do you handle it? Do you bail out? Do you clench all your muscles and 'dig in', holding on for dear life? Do you keep popping in and out, trying to find a comfortable spot without really staying long enough to discover what the real problem is?

Ahhh, yoga. Just a reflection of life.

I have actually lost students by making this connection. So hard to face. So hard to do. We all want to judge ourselves and others so harshly. The truth of the matter is that all responses are correct given the energy of the day. Sometimes we don't have the energy to hold on, so we have to bail out. Recognizing that is a good thing. Sometimes we need to tough it out, hanging on til clarity comes, learning from our mistakes. Sometimes the insights are so great that we can only take a bit at a time, so we pop in and out until we are ready to really sit with what it is that God wants us to know.

As we continue to practice, we become more comfortable with discomfort and we realize that sometimes just a small adjustment or two can help us settle in enough that we can begin to find the message that we are looking for. Or that is looking for us.....We figure out that sometimes life is uncomfortable and that if we approach it from an observation point without judgement and self recriminations we can achieve incredible things we never dreamed of.

Like a really great peaceful warrior. Pose. Or life.

Love to all--Namaste'

Ahhh Yoga.....Good

My class this morning was heavenly. While my students were in relaxation and I was sending them positive energy, I had a thought. It was that I am just never, ever more happy and fulfilled than when I am teaching. Do you ever just have those moments where you are just completely 'in the moment' and then you realize how great that moment really is? I have them all the time. It's a wonderful feeling--I call it joy.

Found a fun site this morning--was up late last night with my solar area hurting (no doubt all that nasty food I had been eating during the power outage) Sent some Reiki to it and fell asleep. Got up this morning and it was gone but I just had this nagging feeling it was trying to tell me something. When I did my morning meditation, I lit the solar chakra candle and concentrated energy there. Got curious about chakra sayings and went and googled it and found this site that gives you a test to see which chakra needs refining.

Go here http://www.cobolt.com.au/index.asp?pg=findchakra&sStatus=reset for the link to take it yourself.

Oh....and the one that I needed to refine?

Surely you don't need to ask. LOL! My results:

Well Done! The Chakra that you most need to refine is your Solar Plexus Chakra!...


Yellow: Self Esteem, Confidence, Power.The solar plexus is your inner sun (light), and it is about your relationship to yourself - how you feel about yourself - so from here comes self esteem, self confidence, self worth, or self doubt. This is also the seat of your power. The more genuine self worth you feel the more empowered you are, the more self doubt you have the less empowered you feel.

Big surprise right?