Flighty

So many people live within unhappy circumstances and yet will not take the initiative to change their situation because they are conditioned to a life of security, conformity, and conservatism, all of which may appear to give one peace of mind, but in reality nothing is more dangerous to the adventurous spirit within a man than a secure future. The very basic core of a man's living spirit is his passion for adventure. The joy of life comes from our encounters with new experiences, and hence there is no greater joy than to have an endlessly changing horizon, for each day to have a new and different sun.

Christopher McCandless American Adventurer

When I was a kid, my mom used to say I was flighty. "you switch from one thing to the other based on whatever character in a book you are reading". Guilty. I LOVE to read and I do immerse myself in the book and sometimes I really identify with a character and find myself becoming that person. I'm reading a book right now called "Eat, Pray, Love", that my friend said I MUST read. It's kinda frightening because I don't have to even think about it--this character is me. The shadow me. The one who needs to be free and travel and explore and learn.

The flighty one.

Now don't get me wrong--I love my kids, my husband, my friends--but never in a million years would I have thought this is where I would be. I never wanted to be married, never wanted to have kids, never wanted to live in the suburbs. Wanted to travel the world, live in New York in a penthouse (I know--I HATE New York), wanted to be rich and write novels and dance and sip champagne from a silver slipper ( I know--I HATE champagne)

I wanted to sing, to dance across the sky, to make a difference in the world and most of all to travel, to climb Mount Everest, to visit poor countries like Mother Teresa and touch the faces of those who need healing. I wanted to float on my back in the warm waters of Bali and ride an elephant in the deserts of Africa.

Isn't it just supreme irony that I married a man who resists change and likes routine, live in BOWIE for goodness sake and as a friend once told me, take every opportunity to trap myself into the staid and concrete? Just trying to avoid being flighty.

For some reason, the last SoulCollage card seems to go with this dreaming and I can't figure out why.

I thought it was the One who dances on the edge of possibilities but why does it seem to go with this wistful flightiness? Maybe the edge is the clue. Perhaps it has to do with playing the edge. Doing as much as I can to feed the inner flighty one without falling off into the abyss. The eye is the One who watches and the hawk must be the one who is overlooking the possibilities. She doesn't really look afraid though, in fact, she seems to like playing the edge.

Maybe she's flighty.....

You know, flighty isn't necessarily a bad thing--we all need that sense of adventure and we all need to play our edge sometimes.

What do you think?