Had a good friend come to Meditation Night last night. She and I were very, very close a few years back but went our separate ways or in different directions. When she & I hung out a lot, we were both very frustrated and controlling and spent large amounts of time defining every thing that was wrong with everything and everyone in our circles. Somewhere along the line we both hunkered down in our own lives and let go of what was wrong in every one else's. The big news? Life still went on. Without us. Imagine.
We were standing outside after class, just basking in the glow, feeling our friendship and one of our formally favorite 'chew it til it's dead' subjects came up. Here's what's astounding:
It turned into a frank discussion of how happy we are. How blessed our lives are. How we never would have imagined doing what we are doing and how lucky we are to do it. Every day. This is our life now. And I was struck by the thought that even though both of our lives had changed dramatically and even though we hadn't really made a specific place for one another in our 'new' lives, we still had a large place in our hearts for each other. And the force of our friendship had created huge necessary change which, although painful, had been an enormous catalyst for who we are now. And how cool it was that we were no longer bound by dissatisfaction, we could create a new friendship based on satisfaction. Wow.
Clarity is a cool thing. Present-ness is amazing. Having moments within moments....
Take a look at your relationships. How many are based on a need for gossip or other's problems to be a topic of your conversation? Can you change those friendships into genuine concern for yourselves? It's an interesting thing to do. And while you're at it? Get rid of those toxic ones. They really aren't doing you any good. I know. I been.
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