Where did February go?

Think I missed a month.  In February I went to see my best friend in Florida.  This created much juggling and chess playing.  Fortunately, I am blessed with really great partners who encourage me and support me and kick me out the door when I need to re-group.

I had a marvelous time, enjoyed some me time, some BFF time and even some get to know my BFF's BF time.  Went to Key West, had yummy food and drinks, read some books all the way through and got a chance to remember what I am like when I'm not saving the world. 

Still fit in all my usual activities, attuned some new healers, taught a ton of classes, had a ton of appointments. Life is rolling, rolling, rolling.  Hit a weird spot last week. Looked up and realized that what I have been hoping, praying and working for over the last decade has all happened. In every phase of my life. My children are grown ups with happy relationships.  My career is thriving, peaceful and rewarding.  My marriage is a true partnership. I know who my friends are and feel blessed by their love. 

How odd.  And wonderful.  All week I've been very introspective and reflective. I feel as if we are on the major brink of the next thing.  On the edge of the next chapter.  All my friends who have kids the same age as mine are feeling it, we're talking about it, "how did this happen? how did we get here or more importantly, how did they?"  They are getting real jobs. They are having serious relationships that look like they may be permanent- 'the One', they say with sparkles in their smiles. It's all very exciting albeit a bit scary.  Some of my friends are already grandparents, how strange.

I feel like it was just yesterday I was the young girl with the sparkle in my eyes, planning my own wedding, being head over heels in love.  I was the expectant mom, excited and terrified, overcome with the biggest love I had ever felt when they put that baby in my arms for the first time.  I was the proud mama, cheering my darlings on every step of the way, planning birthday parties, making new friends, overwhelmed with dogs, cats, guinea pigs, rabbits and of course, many, many kids running through my never clean house.

My house is clean now.  And quiet.  But I am not sad, in fact, I am quite the opposite.  I feel excited, like, thrilled even... now we get to do it all over again!  We get to live it all again through the lives of our kids... who get to live it all for the first time. To hear my daughter "smile" over the phone when she reveals that she's falling in love for the first time. Seeing the pictures of the flowers her beau sent, and sharing the joy of her first real Valentines date.  To hear my son and his girl giggling and talking, having fun together, what a joy! Barry & I sometimes beam with ear to ear grins when they start belly laughing-- just like we did when we heard it from them the first time when they were babies, and remember when it was us rolling on the floor, giggling over some shared silliness.

It is so cool that God planned it all out this way.  We get to live our lives with all the uncertainties and insecurities and then take all that we learned and share it with the lives we created with the joining of our own.

Just a bit mind boggling sometimes- eh?