The more things change......
Full circle. Life is an amazing thing. We think we are accomplishing so much and moving forward and making progress and the truth is that we are only growing. We will keep coming back to the same place over and over, hopefully with a bit more perspective, maybe a little maturity, definitely with a little less energy.

In Celestine Prophecy, one of my favorite books, it says that we will keep living our life dramas over and over until we figure them out and then we can leave them behind. That's why we keep meeting the same type of people, reinacting the same situations, having the same thing happen to us over and over. We say things like "why does this always happen to me?" "when will I stop doing ______this?" "I always come across that same kind of ______person (controlling, victim, martyr, user, you fill in the blanks) "

The solution is to figure out what the situation/person/drama is trying to tell you. Course that doesn't necessarily mean that's the end. We then have to figure out what to do with the info. And lots of time we are only skimming the surface.....there are many, many layers to the drama, most times we are only just beginning the understanding. That's why it takes lifetimes. That's why some believe in reincarnation, you can look around you and see many people who will just never get it in a lifetime. Maybe even yourself. Me too.

I have once again come full circle. In so many ways I am right back to where I started 5 years ago, 10, 15, 20..... Same dramas, same people, only some of the faces have changed. Like my own. It can be rather frustrating/depressing. But I am lucky. I know what to do. I have a whole tool box to draw from.

When you are busy with life's accomplishments and fulfilling your purposes, many times you forget what brought you to where you are. What brought me to now sanely (and I use the word loosely) was yoga, meditation, prayers, journaling, reiki, nature, tarot, silence and breath. Tuning Out. and Tuning In.

Time. Understanding balance, yin and yang. What goes up.....

Thank you for your prayers. I feel them and they are saving me. My dad is as well as he can be at this point. And my mother. It is what it is. This too shall pass. There are always mountains on the sides of the valley. Both are useful.

Every valley I have come out of has had an amazing mountain to conquer.....and I have stood at the top of many of them, sun shining on my face, triumphant. Can't wait to see the next one :)